Summary of Life
GREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLECHILDREN HAVE LEARNED:
1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.
2)When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.
3) If yoursister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person.
4)Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
5) You can't trust dogsto watch your food.
6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting yourhair.
7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.
8)You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
9)Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
10) The best place to bewhen you're sad is Grandma's lap.
GREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:
2) Wrinkles don't hurt.
3)Families are like fudge - mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
4)Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
5)Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.
6) Middle age iswhen you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.
GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD:
1) Growing old ismandatory; growing up is optional.
2)Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
3)When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're downthere.
4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rockingchair that you once got from a roller coaster.
5)It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you thequestions.
6)Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
7) Wisdom comeswith age, but sometimes age comes alone.
THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:
1)You believe in Santa Claus.
2)You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus.
4) You looklike Santa Claus.
SUCCESS:
At age 4 success is . . . Not peeing in your pants.
Atage 12 success is . . . Having friends.
Atage 17 success is . . . Having a driver's license.
Atage 35 success is . . . Having money.
At age 50 success is . . . Havingmoney.
At age 70 success is . . . Having a driver's license.
Atage 75 success is . . . Having friends.
Atage 80 success is . . . Not peeing in your pants.
Passthis on to someone who could use a laugh.
Alwaysremember to forget the troubles that pass your way;
BUTNEVER forgetthe blessings that come each day.
Have a wonderful day withmany *smiles*
Take the timeto live!!!
Life is too short.
Whoo-hoo!
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